Dear Homeschool Mother - Love this!

Dear mother who doesn't think she's patient enough to homeschool,

I'd love to write and tell you that you have nothing to worry about, but I have to be honest and admit that you are right. You most likely are NOT patient enough right now to homeschool your children. Sad, but true.

You may not always have the patience to:

Deal with the house being messed up throughout the day. People actually living and working in a space tends to mean more mess, more books, more projects, more dirt, etc…

Diligently train them to help clean the house because you'll soon discover that you need all hands on deck in order to keep things running.

Diligently train them to respect your authority.

Teach when you are having a bad day.

Teach them when they are having a bad day.

Research, research, research for the `perfect' curriculum. (hahahaha…)

Teach your child something, only to realize that they still don't get it after you've tried several different ways to explain it and ordered 2 or 3 different programs.

Handle yet another melt-down because they don't understand something.

Multi-task cooking dinner, answering algebra questions, negotiating a sibling argument all while another child practices piano.

And the list could go on…

But if you give up on the possibility of homeschooling because you aren't patient enough than you might just miss out on:

The joy of seeing your child really `get it' after they've struggled to learn something new.

Cuddling on the couch in the middle of the day to read and make memories together.

The tight bond that forms between siblings when they must learn how to get along.

Seeing a breakthrough with a child who was having those meltdowns.

Seeing the fruit of the day-in-day-out parenting work.

Addressing conflict head-on and learning how to work in the midst of it.

Helping your children learn how to work through conflict.

Seeing a child apologize for their lack of patience because they've seen you model that.

Realizing that {character} lessons for him are also lessons for you.

Experiencing character growth yourself.

Learning to laugh.

If you wait to start anything challenging until you have perfect patience you won't do anything at all. We need to remember that patience is forged through perseverance. Patience is not some inborn trait. No, patience is developed.

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. James 1:2-3

Before I had children, I seemed to be quite patient. And then, I became a parent… Parenting in and of itself is character building. Homeschooling just amplifies this.

If you are considering homeschooling, the primary question you need to ask is whether or not God wants you to do it? If the answer is a hearty YES, than know that He is going to grow your patience along the way!

So, what to do in those moments when patience is running thin:

Pray, Pray, Pray. When it feels like your day is getting hijacked, you need to be purposeful in prayer. It really beats other `coping mechanisms.'

Rejoice when opportunities arise to grow in patience. Trust me, they'll crop up and rejoicing at the opportunity is going to be much more pleasant and productive than drowning in condemnation.

Recognize the training opportunity. Oftentimes impatience on our part is triggered because we haven't faithfully trained them to do something. We set the tone for the home, the routine and the expectations for behavior. If we are impatient, sometimes it can be because we just need to go back to the `basics' and teach them what is expected and how to do it.

Be Cheerful. Being intentional to say something in a cheerful tone and with a smile on my face really helps me shelve the snarly when it arises.

Put yourself in their shoes… Sometimes I'll catch a glimpse in my child's eye when I'm not being very patient. It takes me instantly back to my own childhood and a time when I was hurt or frustrated by my mom's lack of patience. It helps to try and see things from their perspective.

You Don't Have To Do It All. While we want to embrace opportunities to grow, we can also recognize triggers. There was a brief time growing up when my mom tried to teach me piano. It didn't go over well. She decided the frustration wasn't worth it and quickly found a piano teacher. So pray and discern areas where you need to grow in patience and areas where it might be wise to find outside help.

As a homeschool graduate, I wanted to encourage you that it is OK that you don't have perfect patience. Really. I grew up with an incredible mom, but she certainly wasn't patient all the time. I know the pain and frustration of trying to figure out how to make her happy when she was impatient with us and yet I also watched her diligently turn to God time and time again for help. And you know what? That is what stands out to me now. Instead of the times when she failed, I remember her crying in her room with her Bible open. I remember her coming to us and asking for forgiveness. I remember her encouragement as we all worked as a family in navigating how to live and learn together in harmony. I remember wanting to grow up to become like her.

She grew through the homeschool process and now I'm on my own `growing in patience' journey. I'm grateful for love and grace. I'm thankful for boys who are quick to forgive. I'm thankful for a new day to grow together as a family pursuing the fruit of the Spirit in our lives.

And I'm praying for your journey too!

"May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light." Colossians 1:11

Treasure hunters and pirate sight words

Its been a while since I've posted, but the daily grind of finding new techniques to make my world of reading a better place, is in full swing. We are moving in a kind of rhythm these days, we have found some peace and the learning is...might I actually say...fun? Yep, I'm throwing it out there. And for any mom with a child with learning disabilities, that can be a daunting task. Force feeding learning down a child's throat is possible, but you risk killing the desire to learn in that child. Don't get me wrong, I would pay big bucks to put language arts in an IV and hook my kids up to it. Unfortunately, it requires not only my ability to conjure magical ways to make learning fun, but also opening up their minds to new ideas. There is no way to force this on anyone. We have to decide if we want to retain something. Think about all you learned in school, its only the stuff that was fun to you, that you retained. Or the stuff that some creative teacher made fun, and somehow burned it into your brain. That being said, our jobs as parents/teachers can be very difficult!
I have a few new ideas, nothing amazing but things that are working and brightening up our days.

Just this week, the kids and I watched the Today shows story on Forrest Fenn. Look it up, its a fun story! We are embarking on a treasure hunt and possibly field trip to New Mexico. We will see how far we get on the clues. So in the meantime, my 1st grader, who does not have a learning disability, just a disinterest in reading, and my 2nd grader with dyslexia have been giving me bouts of anxiety about the next school year. I know, why can't wait until summer to worry about next year? Unfortunately, it came to me that if we didn't get into gear, I'd have another year of two non-readers... Ugh... that is not something I want to deal with. I want at least two fluent readers and maybe one that's a struggling learner. That, I can at least comfortably close my eyes and get a good night's sleep with. Sooo...as I pondered the fun in treasure hunting, I realized that this could  make some interesting reasons to want to read. Voila! An idea to make things funner, came to mind. (it's a word and I'm using it!). I created 6 reading clues, some small words to sound out and some of the hated "sight words", hid them all over the house and placed a $1 bill in a treasure box. Amazing what a little creativity and cold hard cash can accomplish. My two little treasure hunters were running around the house, hardly noticing they were reading. Success! No crying, no frustration, just fun. It set the mood of our day very well. We did our sight words with sidewalk chalk on the back patio and then buried ourselves in Forrest Fenn's hidden treasure. Some may say that because we didn't do hours of book learning and flash cards and reading, that the day was wasted. But for me, it was a day of triumph to see my children find the joy in learning. Tonight, Graham opened his e-mail account and sent me the following e-mail:

hi mom you are full of love

And Noah began blogging about his treasure hunt. I will post his postings as they are ready. He will need some help with the poem's clues!

Now for the latest in "sight word art", Daniel and I came up with a picture for "are". Some of these sight words are so difficult to match with a picture.

Pirates say ARE ggghh!

This is a fun story I found at the library and we listened and made a lap book. The lapbook downloads were all free and was to find. This a fun story for boys who don't love reading.

I have now exhausted my idea cache for the week. please post any ideas you may have, I'm always looking for new and improved ways to learn.